Dear Santa,
I know this year has not been my year for glory or crowing achievements, but I know I have been nice as well as lucky. I've won a lot of free goodies this year Santa and I thought that I would share what I thought about them to anyone who wants to read about it. With that being said, I've been lucky with things that in the long run really doesn't matter. Especially if your always alone. Santa, if you could grant my wish, would you please give me a chance at real love? I know I'm not asking for my normal gift of books, but this is something that I really want.
I never think you're too old to stop believing in the things you believed in when you were a kid. I believe in love and I believe in you, but I won't stop believing in either if you can't make my Christmas wish come true. If all you can do is try, I'll be happy with that.
Always,
Valentine
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Holiday Comedy Hour
Hello everyone!
I'm sure that just like me the holidays are taking you by storm. Prepping for Thanksgiving, Black Friday (if you're brave enough to try), and all the other days before Christmas kicked or are currently kicking some ass. I'm totally whipped and so ready for things to settle into a nice, normal, zen like, non-threatening, non-holiday routine. I can't wait to go shopping (leisure time) and not have a stalker follow me in the parking lot.
This happens all the time during the holidays and 1 of 2 things happen. #1 - you're on the way to your car, getting ready to leave and you have a car inches away from your heels trying to follow you to your car. A fun way to mix things up is to "forget" where you parked you car. Start crossing between rows and make a show on looking confused. Another good way to just have some fun is to stop the car that's following you and ask if they've seen your car. Give the discription of the most popular car make and model that's around you. Recently my make believe car has been a Ford Flex or a Honda CR-V. #2 - You see a person starting to pull out a parking space. After a quick scan and finding the row empty of competing vehicles, you turn on your blinker and wait. As you turn into the parking space another vehicle races toward you with killing intent. I have, on a number of occasions, been afraid they would plow right through me to get in the parking space before me. With the knowledge that you have secured your parking space, you go about your business of getting out of the car and walking. Scary factor of the #2 reason for parking lot stalking. The competing vehicle stalks you until they find an opening. The opening is when you try to cross from one side of the parking row to the other. This is when they race to intercept you and proceed to make a scene and look stupid. I've been called all kind of things during the Holiday season and all of it taken with a grain of salt. By yelling, I'm guessing, they try to prove a point that they saw the parking space first (clearly they need flashback glasses). They will proceed to scream obscene phrases and names proving (at the very least) that they are creative. Then they give the finger and tire squeal off into the sunset pissed and snorting fire. My favorite thing to do is interrupt them in the middle of their long winded insult and wish them a Merry Christmas and tell them that I hope Santa can help cure their tourette's. Gets them every time!
During this time of volatile human temperament, find the time to make fun of it all. Even if it's at yourself. It does wonders for the soul to make light of a usually ugly situation.
On another note, this Holiday season I plan to put up as many reviews as I can. They are not going to be in any particular order, but if they do come sold in a kit or set the reviews will be consecutive until the kit or set is fully reviewed. An example of this is when I review Shunga's Garden of Edo Organic Collection Set I will introduce them and then review them separately until the full set is complete. Copacetic? No disputes? Wicked. Moving on!
If there is anything that you do have questions about or I haven't come up with a review yet that you want to see, please contact me via email. Some products I don't have, but I will do my best to accommodate any questions. If I can't answer them I will have find other blogs, articles or videos that help answer your question.
As I'm sure your going to hear all through Christmas into New Years, have a Happy Holiday and a Merry Christmas. More importantly, have fun!
Valentine
I'm sure that just like me the holidays are taking you by storm. Prepping for Thanksgiving, Black Friday (if you're brave enough to try), and all the other days before Christmas kicked or are currently kicking some ass. I'm totally whipped and so ready for things to settle into a nice, normal, zen like, non-threatening, non-holiday routine. I can't wait to go shopping (leisure time) and not have a stalker follow me in the parking lot.
This happens all the time during the holidays and 1 of 2 things happen. #1 - you're on the way to your car, getting ready to leave and you have a car inches away from your heels trying to follow you to your car. A fun way to mix things up is to "forget" where you parked you car. Start crossing between rows and make a show on looking confused. Another good way to just have some fun is to stop the car that's following you and ask if they've seen your car. Give the discription of the most popular car make and model that's around you. Recently my make believe car has been a Ford Flex or a Honda CR-V. #2 - You see a person starting to pull out a parking space. After a quick scan and finding the row empty of competing vehicles, you turn on your blinker and wait. As you turn into the parking space another vehicle races toward you with killing intent. I have, on a number of occasions, been afraid they would plow right through me to get in the parking space before me. With the knowledge that you have secured your parking space, you go about your business of getting out of the car and walking. Scary factor of the #2 reason for parking lot stalking. The competing vehicle stalks you until they find an opening. The opening is when you try to cross from one side of the parking row to the other. This is when they race to intercept you and proceed to make a scene and look stupid. I've been called all kind of things during the Holiday season and all of it taken with a grain of salt. By yelling, I'm guessing, they try to prove a point that they saw the parking space first (clearly they need flashback glasses). They will proceed to scream obscene phrases and names proving (at the very least) that they are creative. Then they give the finger and tire squeal off into the sunset pissed and snorting fire. My favorite thing to do is interrupt them in the middle of their long winded insult and wish them a Merry Christmas and tell them that I hope Santa can help cure their tourette's. Gets them every time!
During this time of volatile human temperament, find the time to make fun of it all. Even if it's at yourself. It does wonders for the soul to make light of a usually ugly situation.
On another note, this Holiday season I plan to put up as many reviews as I can. They are not going to be in any particular order, but if they do come sold in a kit or set the reviews will be consecutive until the kit or set is fully reviewed. An example of this is when I review Shunga's Garden of Edo Organic Collection Set I will introduce them and then review them separately until the full set is complete. Copacetic? No disputes? Wicked. Moving on!
If there is anything that you do have questions about or I haven't come up with a review yet that you want to see, please contact me via email. Some products I don't have, but I will do my best to accommodate any questions. If I can't answer them I will have find other blogs, articles or videos that help answer your question.
As I'm sure your going to hear all through Christmas into New Years, have a Happy Holiday and a Merry Christmas. More importantly, have fun!
Valentine
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Free Condoms?! Sounds Suspect...
The company called Undercover Condoms sponsors any Friday of their choosing to giveaway free condoms or other items. All you have to do is go to Free Condom Friday and follow their rules for entry.
Undercover Condoms is a great place that covers all your condoms needs by carrying top brands you trust. They also sell condom compacts, dental dams, vibrators, lubricants, and so much more. While their selection isn't as extensive as EdenFantasys, Babe Land, or My Pleasure it's still worth a look.
Free Condom Friday is a chance to win (what else?) free condoms. This is an excellent way to try new items you normally wouldn't want to spend your money on. Since it doesn't coast you anything to enter, what do you have to loose? The only thing you need to supply is an email address so that they can contact you if you win. They don't spam or email unless you join their mailing list. You can also check them out on Facebook, Twitter, or their blog. If on the rare occasion they do sponsor a giveaway that isn't condom related, they specify what is up for grabs. For instance the first time I entered the contest they were giving away Blossom Organics samples of lube and arousal gel. I was all to please to see the email saying a won one of the duel sample packs.
So this Friday, what are you going to do?
If you
answered anything other than check out Free Condom Friday, then you're a
dunce. Seems silly not to try for something that's free.
Pink Swirl G
The Pink Swirl by S SA Glass is the perfect addition to any collection or for someone who's starting out. This nice translucent pink dildo 7 1/2 inches long with an insertable length of 6 1/4 inches. It has a diameter of 1 3/8 inches at the widest part and weighs 11 ounces. This makes is rather weighty, but it has a nice feel to it. When I purchased this it was on sale form $29.99 to $14.66. I'm a woman who loves a deal and this is the price that I can handle. Eden is always doing sales so you can scout out their site to see what is currently playing in the sales field.
When you get this through the mail, it comes with a holding pouch. I love the idea, but once you get it you'll find that the pouch is a little lacking. It's a very thin felt/velvet material that holds the dildo with room to spare; however, since this is a glass dildo you might find you want more protection than thin material. It's a good idea to keep it since it does protect the dildo and it's also good if your traveling.
The material is made of Pyrex glass and is completely smooth and seamless. With that being said, not every single one of them are the same. When comparing mine to the picture on Eden, the one I have has a more mushroom shaped tip instead of a nice arrowed flare. Since this is made out of Pyres glass you can sterilize it with no problem. If you do boil or use the top tack of the dish washer, please be mindful of the temperature of the glass. You can use any lube with Pyrex, but be warned that it can get a little slippery when there is a lot of excess lube. So use caution and make sure you don't drop it on a hard surface.
I find this dildo to be ascetically pleasing as well as physically pleasing. Pink Swirl G has a slight curve that allows for easier access to the g-spot - just like the name implies. One end is a sphere while the other end is an arrow/phallic shape. In between them is the shaft that has and equally translucent pink swirl. This isn't a drastically raised feature, but it is noticeable when inserted. Like all textured toys, the texture won't hurt if you build up a rhythm and use enough lube. Take your time and enjoy what the toy is made for.
My experience with the Pink Swirl G has been nothing but spectacular. I love the feel of the raised swirl texture. I also like that the more pointed end will catch lightly on my pubic bone when used at the right angle. There are always more uses for glass dildos than what they are intentionally sold for. Since both ends of the Pink Swirl taper nicely. Anyone who likes anal will love this particular dildo. While I'm sure it might seem intimidating to those who haven't tried anal or who are used to a more flared base, don't be afraid. If you and/or your partner have control you have nothing to worry about. Just use adequate lube and go at a pace that is comfortable to you. This can also double as a massage aid. You can place it in your palm and role it along someones back or use the rounded end to target muscle groups. If anyone is familiar with JimmyJane (which I will also be reviewing) the Contour I is meant for the same function. When the day comes that my Pink Swirl breaks, I will be devastated, but I have a feeling that I have enough toy to replace it or I can just buy it from Eden again.
When you get this through the mail, it comes with a holding pouch. I love the idea, but once you get it you'll find that the pouch is a little lacking. It's a very thin felt/velvet material that holds the dildo with room to spare; however, since this is a glass dildo you might find you want more protection than thin material. It's a good idea to keep it since it does protect the dildo and it's also good if your traveling.
The material is made of Pyrex glass and is completely smooth and seamless. With that being said, not every single one of them are the same. When comparing mine to the picture on Eden, the one I have has a more mushroom shaped tip instead of a nice arrowed flare. Since this is made out of Pyres glass you can sterilize it with no problem. If you do boil or use the top tack of the dish washer, please be mindful of the temperature of the glass. You can use any lube with Pyrex, but be warned that it can get a little slippery when there is a lot of excess lube. So use caution and make sure you don't drop it on a hard surface.
I find this dildo to be ascetically pleasing as well as physically pleasing. Pink Swirl G has a slight curve that allows for easier access to the g-spot - just like the name implies. One end is a sphere while the other end is an arrow/phallic shape. In between them is the shaft that has and equally translucent pink swirl. This isn't a drastically raised feature, but it is noticeable when inserted. Like all textured toys, the texture won't hurt if you build up a rhythm and use enough lube. Take your time and enjoy what the toy is made for.
My experience with the Pink Swirl G has been nothing but spectacular. I love the feel of the raised swirl texture. I also like that the more pointed end will catch lightly on my pubic bone when used at the right angle. There are always more uses for glass dildos than what they are intentionally sold for. Since both ends of the Pink Swirl taper nicely. Anyone who likes anal will love this particular dildo. While I'm sure it might seem intimidating to those who haven't tried anal or who are used to a more flared base, don't be afraid. If you and/or your partner have control you have nothing to worry about. Just use adequate lube and go at a pace that is comfortable to you. This can also double as a massage aid. You can place it in your palm and role it along someones back or use the rounded end to target muscle groups. If anyone is familiar with JimmyJane (which I will also be reviewing) the Contour I is meant for the same function. When the day comes that my Pink Swirl breaks, I will be devastated, but I have a feeling that I have enough toy to replace it or I can just buy it from Eden again.
Monday, November 21, 2011
Glass Ben Wa Balls
As a young woman pretty ignorant to anything sex toy related, I thought these were perfect for a beginner because they looked simple enough. So, I purchased glass ben wa balls by Topco Sales from EdenFantasys for $11.99. Inside the glass is a flower which made them look even more harmless.
For those of you who don't know, ben wa balls are meant for vaginal exercising or kegel exercising. They're are multipurpose and are good for increasing orgasm control. As for being multipurpose, they can be inserted when having sex or you can use them as a massage tool. These ben wa balls came packaged in a velvet box that is to be used for their storage. This keeps them from breaking and no one watch shattered glass all over the floor.
These balls wont cause any bodily harm because of their small size of 1 inch diameter. They are made of a seamless Pyrex glass, so if you find a nick or crack in them before you even use them contact the vendor or Topco Sales for faulty products and don't use them. Even after you've used them and you still find a chip please discontinue use. Also, please use caution when using them (even though it's Pyrex) the glass can still break when dropped.
These rant a 10 out of 10 on Eden since they can be sterilized and are made of a non-porous material. I find this a MAJOR plus because I'm all about keeping things clean and tidy because I put these in my body and I don't want something that will cause infection or anything else unthinkable. These can also be used with water or silicone base lubricants.
From my experience with these ben wa balls, wearing them during sex can get a little tricky. While I'm sure the feel is rockin' for the men, as a woman you have to go in there after them when you're done. While I know my body isn't a bottomless pit, it certainly feels like it when those little guys get pushed to the end of me. With adequate lubrication they do fall right out, but sometimes they can get shy. I've also found that these can be used for massages. Place massage oil and balls in the palm of your hand and you have an instant massaging aid. I've found that the box they come in is very sturdy and has held up very well over the years.
This is by far my most tame toy, but I think they are a must have.
For those of you who don't know, ben wa balls are meant for vaginal exercising or kegel exercising. They're are multipurpose and are good for increasing orgasm control. As for being multipurpose, they can be inserted when having sex or you can use them as a massage tool. These ben wa balls came packaged in a velvet box that is to be used for their storage. This keeps them from breaking and no one watch shattered glass all over the floor.
These balls wont cause any bodily harm because of their small size of 1 inch diameter. They are made of a seamless Pyrex glass, so if you find a nick or crack in them before you even use them contact the vendor or Topco Sales for faulty products and don't use them. Even after you've used them and you still find a chip please discontinue use. Also, please use caution when using them (even though it's Pyrex) the glass can still break when dropped.
These rant a 10 out of 10 on Eden since they can be sterilized and are made of a non-porous material. I find this a MAJOR plus because I'm all about keeping things clean and tidy because I put these in my body and I don't want something that will cause infection or anything else unthinkable. These can also be used with water or silicone base lubricants.
From my experience with these ben wa balls, wearing them during sex can get a little tricky. While I'm sure the feel is rockin' for the men, as a woman you have to go in there after them when you're done. While I know my body isn't a bottomless pit, it certainly feels like it when those little guys get pushed to the end of me. With adequate lubrication they do fall right out, but sometimes they can get shy. I've also found that these can be used for massages. Place massage oil and balls in the palm of your hand and you have an instant massaging aid. I've found that the box they come in is very sturdy and has held up very well over the years.
This is by far my most tame toy, but I think they are a must have.
First Review - Love Vibes Sweetheart
One of the first things I had ever purchased from EdenFantasys was a harmless sounding vibrator called Love vibes sweetheart - Traditional by California Exotics. This small purchase was what started it all.
I paid $23.59 and the last time I looked (11/20/11) it was on sale for $17.69. What woman doesn't love a sale! For that price you get a long lasting, wild ride that doesn't ask questions or ruin the moment.
This red little beast is 8 1/2 inches long as has a diameter of 1 3/4 inches with an insertable length of 7 inches. It's surface is smooth and seamless. Inside the red jelly are silver glitter flecks that really appeal to the girly girl in me. I though "oooo shiny" and the next thing I knew it was in my checkout cart. On this vibrator there are 5 textured rings that have little heart nubs on them for added stimulation. This super cutie has 10 vibrating patters. Some are light flutters for those who like light sensation and some are deep hums that you can feel in your bones for those who want a wild ride.
On the bottom of the vibrator is the battery cap and the function buttons. The sweetheart is a waterproof vibrator (thank god!) and takes 2 AA batteries. If your unsure of the cap is on tight enough, and trust me you'll know the difference between tight and not tight, do a super quick submersion test. If there is any water where it shouldn't be then you know to tighten it just a bit more. After two times of putting in the batteries you won't need to worry ever again. You'll be a Pro! You just get the hang of it. If everything checks out then proceed to have fun by using the function buttons! There are only 2. One turns the vibrator on and off while the other cycles through the 10 delicious patterns.
Now if your familiar with EdenFantasys this can be overlooked by you because you'll see it on the product page (just click the link). For those of you that are unaware, Eden has a safety scale and this product rates 2 out of 10. Don't be alarmed! This rating is based on the material the product is made out of and since this is a jelly it does rank low. Meaning this might not want to be a toy you share with others. Here are also a few tips for taking care of a jelly product:
One being the function buttons. I know from experience that when your really getting into what a vibrator can offer you and you forget that your family has keys to the house. Things can get a bit dicey. Since both the on/off and cycle buttons are so close, you never really know what one is which. I had a 50/50 chance of getting it right and I failed. Epically. Instead of pushing the off button, I pushed the cycle button to the highest pattern and got some strange looks when I rushed out of my room to meet my family. In a dead silent house it was hard to miss. Another con is that if you forget to take out the batteries and decide to travel with it, there is no function locking mechanism. If it goes off your suitcase or duffel it will be buzzing up a storm and the batteries will be wasted.
Overall, this red sweetheart melts my heart every time I use it. I would highly suggest checking it out if any of the above interested you at all.
I paid $23.59 and the last time I looked (11/20/11) it was on sale for $17.69. What woman doesn't love a sale! For that price you get a long lasting, wild ride that doesn't ask questions or ruin the moment.
This red little beast is 8 1/2 inches long as has a diameter of 1 3/4 inches with an insertable length of 7 inches. It's surface is smooth and seamless. Inside the red jelly are silver glitter flecks that really appeal to the girly girl in me. I though "oooo shiny" and the next thing I knew it was in my checkout cart. On this vibrator there are 5 textured rings that have little heart nubs on them for added stimulation. This super cutie has 10 vibrating patters. Some are light flutters for those who like light sensation and some are deep hums that you can feel in your bones for those who want a wild ride.
On the bottom of the vibrator is the battery cap and the function buttons. The sweetheart is a waterproof vibrator (thank god!) and takes 2 AA batteries. If your unsure of the cap is on tight enough, and trust me you'll know the difference between tight and not tight, do a super quick submersion test. If there is any water where it shouldn't be then you know to tighten it just a bit more. After two times of putting in the batteries you won't need to worry ever again. You'll be a Pro! You just get the hang of it. If everything checks out then proceed to have fun by using the function buttons! There are only 2. One turns the vibrator on and off while the other cycles through the 10 delicious patterns.
Now if your familiar with EdenFantasys this can be overlooked by you because you'll see it on the product page (just click the link). For those of you that are unaware, Eden has a safety scale and this product rates 2 out of 10. Don't be alarmed! This rating is based on the material the product is made out of and since this is a jelly it does rank low. Meaning this might not want to be a toy you share with others. Here are also a few tips for taking care of a jelly product:
- You can't boil them like silicone toys. That's why the rating is so low. There is no real way to completely sanitize them.
- To clean, use a toy cleaner or a very mild soap and rinse with water. Using anything too harsh may cause the toy to break down and we don't want that.
- If you do find that you want to share this toy, use a condom to protect the toy and to protect you.
- You can use both water and silicone based lubricants.
One being the function buttons. I know from experience that when your really getting into what a vibrator can offer you and you forget that your family has keys to the house. Things can get a bit dicey. Since both the on/off and cycle buttons are so close, you never really know what one is which. I had a 50/50 chance of getting it right and I failed. Epically. Instead of pushing the off button, I pushed the cycle button to the highest pattern and got some strange looks when I rushed out of my room to meet my family. In a dead silent house it was hard to miss. Another con is that if you forget to take out the batteries and decide to travel with it, there is no function locking mechanism. If it goes off your suitcase or duffel it will be buzzing up a storm and the batteries will be wasted.
Overall, this red sweetheart melts my heart every time I use it. I would highly suggest checking it out if any of the above interested you at all.
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